Greetings
Do you ever experience awkward hellos or goodbyes? I do all the time! I inevitably will go in for the kiss, only to have somebody diss me with a straight hug. Or I'll give a kiss and a hug and the person will be pulling away after the kiss, expecting that the greeting was finished. So we will then awkwardly hug for a moment (how long do you then hold the hug?) before avoiding eye contact and skedaddling.
My cousin used to date a man who obviously was uncomfortable with the greeting system, so when I would give him a kiss on the cheek he would end up kissing me in a weird spot, like my ear, or my shoulder. I dreaded seeing him. Last night I went to give a friendly hello and pat on the head to a young lad and he surprised me with a kiss instead. AWKWARD. Do you shake hands, pull in for the hug, seal it with a kiss? What is the appropriate greeting for friends, people you barely know, relatives? And then, what kills me, what if you meet up with somebody out of the blue, greet hello and then 2 minutes later when you move on, do you have to do it all over again to say good-bye? I mean, we JUST kissed hello; do we really now have to kiss good-bye? It seems a bit much!
My family is pretty easy. Kiss and hug. I can do that. But it's the undefined relationships that confuse me. I need to come up with a system, and not veer from it for anybody. If you are somebody I barely know, I will extend my hand and give a kiss on the cheek. But if I just met you, I will not hug or kiss you. We can shake hands or just a quick wave as my back-up. If you are somebody I know well, I will give a hug. Oh, I don't even know if that is the socially acceptable solution! I need guidance... a greetings coach, if you will.
I'm just glad I'm not a guy... how the hell do they know when to just bump shoulders, or go in for the manly hug with just so many pats on the back? Do guys kiss hello to other guys, too, or is it just women? And then they have to deal with the whole how to end a first date dilemma... (now is it any wonder that I would avoid social situations at any cost if I could???)
My cousin used to date a man who obviously was uncomfortable with the greeting system, so when I would give him a kiss on the cheek he would end up kissing me in a weird spot, like my ear, or my shoulder. I dreaded seeing him. Last night I went to give a friendly hello and pat on the head to a young lad and he surprised me with a kiss instead. AWKWARD. Do you shake hands, pull in for the hug, seal it with a kiss? What is the appropriate greeting for friends, people you barely know, relatives? And then, what kills me, what if you meet up with somebody out of the blue, greet hello and then 2 minutes later when you move on, do you have to do it all over again to say good-bye? I mean, we JUST kissed hello; do we really now have to kiss good-bye? It seems a bit much!
My family is pretty easy. Kiss and hug. I can do that. But it's the undefined relationships that confuse me. I need to come up with a system, and not veer from it for anybody. If you are somebody I barely know, I will extend my hand and give a kiss on the cheek. But if I just met you, I will not hug or kiss you. We can shake hands or just a quick wave as my back-up. If you are somebody I know well, I will give a hug. Oh, I don't even know if that is the socially acceptable solution! I need guidance... a greetings coach, if you will.
I'm just glad I'm not a guy... how the hell do they know when to just bump shoulders, or go in for the manly hug with just so many pats on the back? Do guys kiss hello to other guys, too, or is it just women? And then they have to deal with the whole how to end a first date dilemma... (now is it any wonder that I would avoid social situations at any cost if I could???)
posted by Tracy at 8:04 AM
4 Comments:
I hear they have certain nightclubs you can go to where you'll see guys kissing other guys. Outside of that, NO.
I feel awkward with the kissing thing. Hugging too sometimes. I'm kinda tall and bony, so more often than not if I hug someone, they're going to have my shoulder bone in their chin. Not comfy.
What a grea post...I go through this all the time! Especially since I've always found a big difference between European greetings and North American greetings, if that makes any sense.
My girlfriend's family is from Greece, and they always kiss hello once they know someone decently well. But the problem is that they usually kiss one cheek, but sometimes two, or three depending on the situation. Her brother's girlfriend is French Canadian, and they often kiss two cheeks. So I can never remember what I'm supposed to be doing and either 1) pull away too early and feel rude and usually get kissed on the neck by accident or 2) sit there dangling when the other person has finished kissing. It's always embarassing and I kind of dread it, which is sad because I really like the hello kiss.
I shake hands with everyone upon first meeting them, I hug anyone I met before and hit it off with, or am close to, and kiss only a select few where there's precedence set :). I'm big about the hello hug too, provided the person actually hugs you and doesn't give that weak one-arm butt-tucked-away hug ~lol~
i feelso fortunate to have friends who give the best freaking hugs.
I am so not good at greetings. If it's another friend of mine I am familiar with (like Afunt) I will give them a hug - that's what both parties are familiar with and it feels ok. But, a few weeks back a friend of GF's brought this man over whom she's seeing (I do not approve of this man and of the relationship for MANY reasons I will not get in to) and the guy grabbed GF and gave her a hug and a kiss. He turned to me and I about ran off - I think if he went to do that same thing I would have slugged him. Fortunately for him he sensed this and stuck out his hand. Sometimes I don't even want to shake hands - you're getting ready to eat food and someone comes up and introduces themselves and you shake their sweaty hand and NOW you have to get back up and go to the restroom and wash them before you eat!
Why can't greetings just be "Hey, howya doin?" Like Joey in "Friends"?
I'm really in for it as my sister lives in Switzerland and she says everyone (especially Germans) kiss on the cheek three times! Please help me Goddess I don't slug someone when I go over there to see her!
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