Half-Way Point

There are some pretty gross things that people do not warn women about when it comes to pregnancy. Thank goodness for the internet and those pregnancy books. Thought I'd give you an abbreviate lesson on what to expect, now that I'm half-way there and have not been thrilled as of yet about any of the surprises I've encountered.

1. Soggy Bottoms. This is incredibly gross, so I'll just be blunt. Thick, creamy discharge. Buy a lot of new undies, because you'll need them.

2. Bloody Hell. Again, gross. Brush your teeth, mouth full of blood. Blow your nose, tissue full of blood. Something happens to your membranes, I guess, and you end up bleeding more than ever before.

3. Rand McNally Boobs. Your bigger breasts become patterned with blue veins. If you are pale like me, this is very noticeable and I cannot say it's sexy.

4. It's a Gas. Burping and farting become as common as breathing.

I've heard of other events that occur in some women, but luckily I have not had the pleasure of experiencing things like swollen ankles or an enlarged nose as of yet. I'll let you know when I get to that point. (Tonight we find out the sex, if this little thing cooperates... I'm so excited!)